5. Leaving Camp Covid

Playing it safe before leaving 'Camp Covid'

Catch up on the rest of the story and read the tales of 'Camp COVID' in order: 1. Alive and Well at Camp Covid 2. Adventures at Camp Covid 3. Life and Times at Camp Covid 4. Enlightened at Camp Covid 5. Leaving Camp Covid 6. Camp Covid Epilogue 7. Return to Camp Covid NEWS: Calgary Herald, Global News, CBC News

Another couple of days in ‘Camp Covid’ and then I’m getting released. Jenn’s doctor said that even though she is sounding much better they can’t be sure she’s still not contagious. I passed along that information to the COVID team at 811 Alberta Health Services and they have extended my stay here to be on the safe side. I will be released back into the wilds of Kensington on Sunday.

Throughout this entire ordeal Alberta Health Services has been fantastic and I can’t thank the legion of healthcare workers who are fighting this beast on the daily enough. Thank you! For the record — if you haven't been following all the stuff I've been writing — we followed all the rules and restrictions, haven't traveled, nor gone to any gatherings, we always wear masks everywhere and sanitize regularly; Covid came to us via Jenn's work as a healthcare provider. No one is to blame except perhaps whomever had the virus and didn't wear a mask, but I digress.

On to happier things

The other day I got a care package from the hotel staff after they caught up on my adventures through my blog posts and resulting media attention. They packed a tea mug with some tea and honey, some fresh fruit, and what I can only imagine is a small cape into a cool Ramada nap-sack. Marnie Crowe, the Director of Sales and Revenue, even wrote me a delightful note that brought a smile and brightened my day. Thank you Marnie!

There is a small but mighty army of amazing people here at the Ramada Plaza helping all of us 'Camp Covid' campers — Marnie calls them our ‘Camp Covid Counsellors’ which made me laugh. I would like to thank Teri, Kenny, Thomas, Tony, Petra, Valentine, Ruby and Chris for looking after us up here. Your care and attention to us does not go unnoticed even though we’ve never met. I hopefully haven’t missed anyone — if I have please let me know — you folks are awesomesauce.

Thank you Marnie, Teri, Kenny, Thomas, Tony, Petra, Valentine, Ruby and Chris for looking after us up here.

It’s still all about Brad

Marnie has informed me that Brad will be getting a check-up when I check out. As it happens Brad’s switch actually doesn’t work which is why he was unplugged — there is no way to turn him off once he’s on unless you unplug him; this must be stressful for a little desk lamp. I’m really glad he’s going to get the help he needs, and am thrilled that because of our time together he will be looked after and be back to brightening up this little corner of the world for weary travellers for years to come. I salute you Brad, you will forever be in my heart.

A word about hotel soap

My room was fully stocked with two weeks worth of shampoo, conditioner, moisturizer, hand sanitizer, mouthwash, and little bars of soap — one with bumps and one without bumps. The one with bumps is labeled ‘Gentle Cleanse Massage Bar’ and I have to admit I just thought it was a cute marketing ploy, I mean what could these little bumps do that a normal bar of soap can’t? In all my time here I have just been using the regular, bumpless soap. Today that changed. No more bumpless soap for me, it’s ‘Massage Bars’ all the way. I’m going to spoil myself.

Carefully unwrapping the ‘Massage Bar’ I felt a surge of excitement, this must be what Charlie felt when he was unwrapping a ‘Wonka Bar’ just before finding his Golden Ticket. I just knew that this experience was going to be life-changing. ‘Massage Bar’ in hand I jumped in the shower, had a nice long soak to loosen up those achy muscles, and then, ‘Massage Bar’ at the ready, I started at my left shoulder, working down to my chest. It didn’t really feel like a massage, it just felt like a small bar of soap, was I doing it wrong? I tried little circles. Nothing. Was this supposed to be a ’personal massage bar’? As I stood in the shower contemplating the various ways I might have misunderstood the ways to use this soap I noticed that the bumps were all gone. One tour of my shoulders and chest and all the ‘massage’ properties had vanished, fortunately I have three more ‘Massage Bars’ left. I will continue to spoil myself in these, my final days at ‘Camp Covid’, and learn the secrets of the Ramada Plaza Massage Bar.

I will continue to spoil myself in these, my final days at ‘Camp Covid’, and learn the secrets of the Ramada Plaza Massage Bar.

One of the things I probably should have brought with me was a razor. I decided early on that I would just have to make do with whatever I had packed in my toiletries kit because I thought I couldn’t get anything delivered accept from a pharmacy. By the time I discovered I could get stuff delivered to the front desk and brought up I had already doubled-down on the mountain man look and figured I would just let everything grow for as long as I’m in here.

An out of focus Sasquatch on the seventh floor

This does bring up an interesting question: Do I continue to grow out my hair to truly epic lengths and go full-on Mountain Man Biker, or do I go back to the tight-blue mohawk? The greatest thing about the mohawk is how low maintenance it is. When my hair is long it gets besieged by Scottish curls with no sense of direction and shameless disregard for brushing, hair products, and gravity. It eats ‘Tame’ for breakfast and spits out the bottle, laughing and braying in a deep Scottish brogue, “Is that all you’ve got!?!” Perhaps the mohawk is the safest bet — less chance of my hair taking over the city, running amok and causing chaos. Although that would make for an interesting and fitting end to the ‘Tales from Camp Covid’.

This has been an adventurous week here on the seventh floor of the Ramada Plaza. As I mentioned in an earlier post the media caught wind of my adventures and has done a great job getting the word out there that this is a viable and vital resource for anyone who needs to quarantine but doesn’t have a place to do it.

Speaking of which, journalist Natalie Valleau did an article on CBC’s website as a follow-up to the interview I did with Jim Brown on ‘The Homestretch’ last week. Natalie did a great job of getting all the facts and timelines correct while at the same time offering tips and tricks to help others in a similar situation. There have been many people who enjoyed the article and have been directed to my website so they can read all the accounts of ‘Camp Covid’ so far.

Media attention does bring out some very ‘passionate’ people in the comment sections which I’m finding tremendously entertaining. I’d like to thank all the wonderful people who have taken a stand against these passionate ‘Keyboard Warriors’ in the kindest of ways, carefully pointing out flaws, errors, and/or omissions in their logic. It’s nice to see reasonable people helping lower the volume on misguided hate and getting back on topic, namely: There is a well-thought out and implemented program in place for people to safely quarantine so others don’t get sick.

I think my favourite comment so far has been the misguided tirade from serial CBC commenter and ‘man committed to not researching anything before yelling at the wind’, RC, who ends his post with “I hope you get bed bugs for life.” Not going to lie, I actually laughed out loud at that one.

"I hope you get bedbugs for life." -- RC, passionate and caring human

These are my final days at 'Camp Covid', and to be honest its bitter sweet — I’ve made the best out of a bad situation. I’ve been introduced to some incredible people along the way from reporters to media personalities to a lady named Leslie who reached out to let me know she appreciated hearing my story as her daughter was also in quarantine at a different hotel. I’ve had friends stand up for me and Jenn against online bullies and jerks, and have had countless friends just make the time to chat or connect online. It’s nice.

All told it has been a great reminder that there’s hope for us if we keep working together as a society to stay negative in a positive kinda way, if you get my drift.

In the immortal words of Panda: “Be kind. Help each other. And wear a fucking mask.”